HIATUS IS OVER MAYBE?

Surely RIGHT?

Okay first off, I would apologize. Not “I would like to” but “I would”. I WOULD apologize if you fuckers deserved it. I want to make it clear that you do not. You bastards keep asking “SARA?!?! WHEN IS THE NEXT POST??~~~ SAWA YOU ARE TWO WEEKS LATE OR THREE WEEKS LATE (for the record I don’t actually remember how long it’s been) PLEASE GIVE US A POST PLEASE IM BEGGING YOU WE LOVE YOUR POSTS SO MUCH SAWA PLEASE MAAM PLEASE WE NEED THIS WE NEED IT SO BAD WERE USELESS WITHOUT YOUR POST WE REALLY NEED THEM SO FUCKING WRITE YOUR SHIT YOU STUPID BITCH” and I just want to let you know how rude this is! How could you do this! After everything I have given you, everything I have done for you, you just beg and beg. You know how much traction I got on the first week? Let’s just say it was less you assholes. I’ve seen the numbers! (I haven’t checked them in weeks) Okay yes I didn’t spam the link in multiple discords this time, I didn’t shamelessly plug it as much, it’s my fault, yada yada yada, well, here!!!! YOU GOT ANOTHER POST!!!! WOW !!! ARE YOU HAPPY? I BET YOU ARE SO HAPPY AREN’T YOU? You Are So Happy That Sara Spend The Time To Write Another Post For You!!!! Is She Not, So Freaking Nice And Hard Working?

Hard work is what I have been up to lately! I’ve been working two jobs okay!!! Two Jobs!!! Wow!!!!! Yes I’ve been working two jobs and I have been waking up before 8 am everyday, (for the most part) and I have been washing my face 4 times a day, I have been driving hours every day, I have been going to bed before 1 am, (probably not tonight thought I had too much coffee (It’s Thursday Night as I write this)) I have been getting a lot of exercise, (like more than I have in years) and drinking so much water! Wow_! Crazy right? Sawa? Working a lot and sleeping mostly normally and taking care of herself? Exercising???? Who is this Sawa? Is she okay?? Is she an imp.. (not gonna say it)?? No My Dear Reader, This Is Just A New Sawa. Still The Old Sawa, But Not The Same. I Have Changed. You Too Will Change. Change Is Coming For All Of Us. There Will Be Change.

Okay really I have just been too tired to write anything cuz I’ve been working and walking a lot okay. I’m sorry. There, I said it okay. Yea I promised weekly posts but did any of you that know me well really believe that? There’s no way you did right? I hope you didn’t. You shouldn’t trust me so easily you know. Let’s say I did this on purpose to teach you a lesson about trust. That sounds good enough right? Surely.

I hope you all have had a few good weeks or what ever since my last article. Can I call it an article? That sounds pretentious enough right? I’ve kinda just been working, playing the miku gacha that I am not going to batchest about, (I’m not going to explain what batchesting is, some of you not knowing is funny to me) and working on music stuff. I might share some things I’ve been working on here, just maybe. If you are good enough. Make it up to me for asking too much of me while I was working really hard and getting my life together okay?

I drank too much coffee at dinner time and that is the only reason I have enough energy to write this. I’m turning a mistake I made in to ART for YOU FUCKS. Yes, my posts are art. My words are my paint and the blank page is my canvas. I paint decorative tapestries that feeble brains can not even comprehend. That is what I do. I am extremely talented and I just give all my work away for free. All of it! I don’t even give you a way to pay me money!!! I could but I don’t!! I really think everyone reading this should be more grateful. Sound off in the comments how grateful you are for my returning to you my sweet reader that I love and adore!

My caffeine rush is finally starting to wear off I think? I hope so. I didn’t think once about it keeping me up when I chugged that delicious, freshly brewed, pour over dark roast, I forgot the name of the coffee, It is so good, maybe I will rate it eventually in a Saturday Morning Review Post if I even do those again, surely I will right, since I am back I am definitely going to write one this week right? In addition to this post? For sure right?

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The Stars

                    The Stars







The Stars


                   The Death



                                                         The Bright Death


The Stars Die


                                                                    The Sight Sees Death







The Stars














                                         The Stars

I woke up one morning. I woke up in a field. The field was a purple shade I had never seen of grass. I heard wind brushing powerfully against the branches and leaves off in the distance. The bark of the trees were dark purple and their leaves were a bright crimson red. I sat up in this unfamiliar place and I looked around me. I took in the sight yet unseen and then glanced over my body. All was normal. A pale girl in an oversized hoodie, with brown bangs in her eyes. I let out a sigh of relief at something familiar, something that made sense. I tried to sit up but it took much more effort than I suspected. I was very weak. There was very little feeling in my legs and my arms too were not much help. I had yet to look up very far. There was a fear in the back of my head. It was an unconscious fear, or perhaps my peripheral vision trying to warn me of what it knew I would soon look upon. I was scared to look at the sky. The foliage is one thing, but the atmosphere taking on a great change would be too much a shock to the psyche. I inhaled deeply, and slowly let out my breath. I felt a spike in anxiety. My stomach fell as a thought crossed my mind. In this strange place, what if air was not abundant? Could I be so sure I could breathe here? No, there was nothing I could be sure of. Nothing at all. Fortunately, my breath did return and my anxiety did subside for a moment. This is just like me, getting so worked up over something that wasn’t wrong. I felt silly for my momentary stress but smiled warmly at I thought to myself. I was still me, despite the world around me changing. I’d rather keep the less charming parts of myself than losing my own identity. The wind kept blowing. I felt a chill. I shivered for a moment as a strong gust came upon me. The wind was strong enough to make me fall slightly before catching my self with my arm. At this point I felt strength returning to my limbs, so I decided to fully stand up. At this point I made a mistake. We all make mistakes through out our lives. Some are more costly than others. Some mistakes can not be rectified in a meaningful way but you learn to live with them. Some mistakes you can never return from. This mistake was one I would never make again. After bringing myself to my feet I decided to look up. I was staring at my self for a while before trying to stand. At this point I pushed past the fear I felt earlier and moved my eyes toward the sky above me. The field was mostly a clearing, there were very few trees around, yet with the shade of their leaves they were easy to spot. This made it easy to see the sky, much easier than one would ever have wished. I managed to mostly avoid looking at it subconsciously, but now I had made the active decision to take this final step in checking my surroundings. I was shocked for a moment as I couldn’t understand the view before me. The sky was there. It was the sky and nothing else. It was obviously the sky but it was the most different thing about this place. The Stars Are Too Bright. Looking into the Sky stung my Eyes because the Stars are too Bright. The Stars in the Sky are Brighter than the Sun. The Stars are Bursting with Light because they are Dying Over and Over. The Stars are Dying and Bursting with Light and no one notices. No One Sees that the Stars in the Sky are meeting their End. The End of the Stars is noticed by No One. I see Them. I Can See. I alone will see The Death of Every Star. I am cursed by The Sight. I can see what other people can not see. No one else will see this nightmare because no one else exists here. I Have The Sight. The Stars are Dying. Can you Smell their Death? Nothing smells like the death of a star. I was blocking my senses from noticing the smell. Our brains work in weird ways, doing things without our intention. Our bodies are the same. Can I say “our” when there is no one here? I can see so far in the distance but no one is here. There are no buildings here. There are no roads or structures of any kind. Just the occasional tree bleeding it’s bright leaves, and the purple ground below me. The sun was barely able to be seen as it was hiding behind the mass death of its siblings. I could barely make it out behind All The Death but I Knew It Was There. I Could Feel The Sun Watching Me. It Felt Like God. I could not look in the direction or say anything to it. I had not tried to speak yet but I didn’t feel compelled to. Something else grabbed my attention. I noticed something glowing beneath me. Fear was my only reaction. An immense fear I had never felt. Fear is such a familiar word for me that it felt wrong to describe such a feeling, but it was fear nonetheless. I knew something was going to happen. I knew nothing good could come from the glowing of my skin. I felt a burning sensation on every part of my body for just a moment until I lost all feeling altogether. Is this losing your humanity? Is there anything that feels like shedding your humanity quite like losing your entire sense of touch in just a moment? My mind went blank. When a person reaches a point of immense stress in their life they sometimes snap. This snap can take it’s form as a turning off of brain function. It’s almost, or maybe more than almost, an automatic coping mechanism. It’s not the total loss of thoughts, but you feel how slow they become. They crawl and they crawl and your movements feel robotic. In this state you do not feel truly connected with your body or your actions or anything at all. You are alive and existing but everything else is automated. I began to float. I could only tell this because I began to notice the ground getting further and further. I could no longer see the leaves of the bleeding trees or the swaying of the grass in the violet field. I felt no emotion or wind or g-force or anything. I suspected what would come. Maybe my loss of function was a form of acceptance.

I was lifted up so far until the world beneath me could barely be seen. I Had Become A Dying Star. The Stars Meeting Their End Were Perhaps People Just Like Me. I was thrown into the air by an unknown force and I saw my body morph into a circular shape as I flew through the sky. I somehow retained my sense of sight but I was now looking down at a body not attached to my sight. There was nothing attached to me that I could see. I saw what used to be my body grow spikes out of the ball of flesh until it grew in size and was covered in these flesh spikes all over. After it grew to about seven times the size of my former body, The End Came. I saw my former body burst and die like the rest of the stars I couldn’t stand to see earlier. The Sight Allowed Me To See This. It Was The Sight. I Was Allowed To See This Death With A Sight Not Known To Humanity. Humanity Died With The Stars.

I felt my vision begin to fade for a moment and this realization shocked me back into feeling. I knew what was happening. This was the last thing I would ever see. I felt that fear of death I was able to avoid moments before. I felt it in what ever still existed that let me feel emotion. It was the most violent emotion I had every felt. It was a feeling beyond feeling. Maybe this wasn’t a feeling at all, but the weight of a cosmic force crushing my soul. The Darkness Overtook The Sight. The Star Was No More. All Of The Stars Died. I Felt My Own Death. I Felt It At The End Before All Vision Was Lost. The End. The End. The End. The End. The End. The End. The End. The End. The End. The End. The End. The End. The End. The End. The End. The End. The End. The End. The End. The End. The End. The End. The End. The End. The End. The End. The End. The End. The End. The End. The End. The End. The End. The End. The End. The End. The End. The End. The End. The End. The End. The End. The End. The End. The End. The End. The End. The End. The End. The End. The End. The End. The End. The End. The End. The End. The End. The End. The End. The End. The End. The End. The End. The End. The End. The End. The End. The End. The End. The End. The End. The End. The End. The End. The End. The End. The End. The End. The End. The End. The End. The End. The End. The End. The End. The End. The End. The End. The End. The End. The End. The End. The End. The End. The End. The End. The End. The End. The End. The End. The End. The End. The End. The End. The End. The End. The End. The End. The End. The End. The End. The End. The End. The End. The End. The End. The End. The End. The End. The End. The End. The End. The End. The End. The End. The End. The End. The End. The End. The End. The End. The End. The End. The End. The End. The End. The End. The End. The End. The End. The End. The End. The End. The End. The End. The End. The End. The End. The End. The End. The End. The End. The End. The End. The End. The End. The End. The End. The End. The End. The End. The End. The End. The End. The End. The End. The End. The End. The End. The End. The End. The End. The End. The End. The End. The End. The End. The End. The End. The End. The End. The End. The End. The End. The End. The End. The End. The End. The End. The End. The End. The End. The End. The End. The End. The End. The End. The End. The End. The End. The End. The End. The End. The End. The End. The End. The End. The End. The End. The End. The End. The End. The End. The End. The End. The End. The End. The End. The End. The End. The End. The End. The End. The End. The End. The End. The End. The End. The End. The End. The End. The End. The End. The End. The End. The End. The End. The End. The End. The End. The End. The End. The End. The End. The End. The End. The End. The End. The End. The End. The End. The End. The End. The End. The End. The End. The End. The End. The End. The End. The End. The End. The End. The End. The End. The End. The End. The End. The End. The End. The End. The End. The End. The End. The End. The End. The End. The End. The End. The End. The End. The End. The End. The End. The End. The End. The End. The End. The End. The End. The End. The End. The End. The End. The End. The End. The End. The End. The End. The End. The End. The End. The End. The End. The End. The End. The End. The End. The End. The End. The End. The End. The End. The End. The End. The End. The End. The End. The End. The End. The End. The End. The End. The End. The End. The End. The End. The End. The End. The End. The End. The End. The End. The End. The End. The End. The End. The End. The End. The End. The End. The End. The End. The End.

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I hope you all have a great rest of your week! Get some good rest okay! Don’t eat too much candy! Drink lots of water okay! I wish you all luck in your endeavors! Look forward to my next post! Don’t Forget to Share And Like.